Recently I heard a talk about the energy of money. The speaker said that money grows when it is watched, measured and tended. That may be true. But careers are more like “The watched pot never boils.”

Careers usually move more slowly than we would like.

They have an element of luck. I don’t care what anyone says: you can’t be totally strategic when you plan your career.

More than once I’ve taken a job where I was welcomed enthusiastically by my future boss. He (pr, more rarely, she) genuinely appreciated what I had to offer and was thrilled to hire me.

Then a new boss appeared. Sometimes I never got to work for the boss who hired me: he was already gone, leaving me as a legacy for the next boss, who had a totally different vision for my role. At other times the boss left 6 to 12 months later. Once I took a job (against the advice of a savvier friend) where the boss was going to be hired around the same time.

Military officers tell me this is the norm. If you don’t like your boss, just wait it out. He’ll be transferred or you’ll be transferred, hopefully with no damage to your career.

Still, luck plays a big part. When I had corporate jobs, I wished something would happen and I’d suddenly be asked to take on new responsibility. That never happened to me – but some people built a career this way. True, I might have blown the opportunity, but there is a saying that you look like a sergeant when you’ve got stripes on your sleeves. Once you’re promoted, you tend to look like you deserve it.

That’s why it’s a good idea to remain somewhat detached from your career. If you get too involved, you often miss the red flags and pass right by the subtle cues. You see the job as playing a game and you get a kick of out learning the rules. You detach your ego from success.

One way to do this is to have an outside interest that’s really compelling. For many people, it’s a family. For others it’s a hobby or fanaticism. Even getting a dog makes a big difference. I met an executive who walked away from Microsoft and started his own company because he hated being away from his new dog all day.

On Episode 1 of Celebrity Apprentice, Donald Trump goes into a speech about the evils of quitting.

Sometimes quitting is wrong. In particular, if you are very young, you have to be careful. It’s usually better to finish out your stint in graduate school, a tough job, or even the military or Peace Corps. Leaving early can create scars that never quite go away.

But sometimes quitting is the right thing to do. I know someone who quit law school after two years. She didn’t want to generate a mountain of debt. She realized she would be miserable practicing law. More important, she had an alternative that made more sense. Today, she says, she’s earned much more money and been much happier than if she had finished law school.

For her, quitting was like hitting the “restart” button on the computer. Sometimes when things aren’t working right, they sort themselves out with a “restart.”

There’s a reason we have the expression “fish out of water.” A fish can’t live on dry land, at least not for very long.

If you realize you’re in the wrong place, do some reality testing. Talk to an impartial confidante. Hiring a coach for an hour can be a wise investment, saving you thousands of dollars down the road.

When reviewing career change books, I sometimes add the comment, ‘This book seems more appropriate for 20-somethings or 30-somethings. But midlife career changers will resist.”

(1) You need different networking systems. A Young Career Changer (YCC) can ask for informational interviews. He can ask to shadow someone for a day or two.

But if you’re in your 40′s or 50′s, managers may resist opening their doors to someone who’s a peer, perhaps someone who’s been working elsewhere. When I taught live MBA marketing, my “older” students had trouble getting interviews for projects. “Two gray-haired men? They thought the IRS had come to call,” said one student.

For the record, I offered to create a special project for them, but they declined. They’d caught the fire!

(2) You’re un-learning a style of professionalism.

As I like to say: Corporate life is like professional football. Carreer change is like playground basketball.
A whole different set of moves. You can do it, once you realize what’s going on.

(3) Life happens.

I’m not typical: my parents are gone and my next-of-kin has fur and paws. Many 40-plus career changers have teenagers, boomerang kids, aging parents and a whole lot more.

Some of my clients experience health concerns, whether seeking additional medical screenings or dealing with symptoms.

(4) Your day job is more demanding.

By mid-career you’ve probably moved up the corporate ladder and you have more responsibilities. As an executive or professional you may have more flexibility but you work longer hours. And your family becomes more important.

(5) Your comfort zone has gotten broader and deeper.

What’s a lateral move to a YCC may be a giant leap backward at mid-career. I encourage clients to consider the consquences of, say, giving up a large home for a small apartment. Some care a lot. Some barely notice — they’re too excited about the future.

Success depends on feeling proud and happy, genuinely, authentically. Anything else gets in the way.

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