Work-Life Balance? Not always possible.

David Brooks’s New York Times column drew attention to Supreme Court Justice nominee Judge Sonia Sotomayor. Brooks writes about Sotomayor’s sacrifice of personal life to her career. During her marriage, Sotomayor admits, she sometimes left home at 7 AM and didn’t return till 10 PM. Not a good way to create a home life, she says.

Comments on this article are actually more interesting than the article itself. Some readers pointed out that Brooks would not have written this column about a male judge. For one thing, the male judge who kept those long hours would probably have a wife who maintained his home and arranged a social life for his few available hours. For another, men, well, just don’t talk about these things.

Other readers noted that you no longer need to have a traditional style family to feel complete and satisfied. It’s okay to be single.

My own take is that some jobs just don’t allow for balance and some people don’t really want balance. And in the early 21st century, it’s still easier to be career-intensive if you’re male.

In an interview for her book, Generally Speaking, Retired General Claudia Kennedy acknowledged that her life did not have balance for a long time. She divorced her husband and had not remarried by the time she left the military. She noted that she chose to be extremely discreet about her relationships and personal life.

I’ve also known distinguished college professors who put their personal lives on hold for long periods of time because they wanted to gain the benefits (material as well as intellectual) of a career at the top tier of their profession. They were all male and married to stay-at-home moms. I’ve also known a male Internet marketing multi-millionaire who said, “Balance? What’s that?” I believe he eventually found a girlfriend who was willing to work around his life (and maybe he mellowed a little, using some of his money to pay others to free up his time).

Tags: time management